Bipolar, Single & Quarantined

Laid off, again— this time it was the best thing that could have happened to me, in quarantine.  I love to do my personal work from home, but my 9-5 wasn’t welcome here.  It took two painful weeks to discover that— and I’m grateful that I was given a severance.  It has been four weeks since I was laid off and while quarantine is a one day at a time process, my personal projects have been thriving.  I wrote a post on Thrive Global here detailing more of my layoff(s) and the fact that it is a blessing.

I have been writing and coaching and juicing and making organic balms and salves— I have been doing all the things that make me truly happy— which mostly boils down to creating.  Most people with bipolar disorder are extremely creative, and I am no exception to this.  When I write, it’s like my truth and identity is flowing out of me.  When I coach, empathizing with others is a symbiotic process that is therapeutic to my client and myself.  I have been coaching on a donation basis during quarantine and each session expands my heart.  If you or someone you know might be interested in this, please email hi@thebipolardivine.com.

Yesterday I was anxious.  The news got to me and I haven’t been able to fill my anti-anxiety medication as my psychiatrist isn’t working normal hours.  I had to move through my anxiety as best I could on my own.  I live in the super dry rocky mountains, and also have eczema.  My skin is sensitive so I’m conscious of the ingredients I put on it.  A few years ago, I got sick of spending money on lotions and potions that weren’t doing anything and began making my own.  I made 50 jars of all organic lip balm yesterday and am mailing them to anyone who wants one.  It felt good to get out of my head and mix all of the ingredients that feel the best on my skin— it also feels amazing to share.  I then put on a unicorn onesie and watched the OG Disney’s Peter Pan.  I love to love on my inner child.  I had a peaceful sleep and woke up feeling great today.

I am grateful in this time to be single and without children, it’s just me and my husky, Bodie.  It is hard for me to balance my energy, mood, and emotions on a daily basis. I am dedicated to my routine, nutrition and exercise in order to maintain a high vibration. I know I am not ready to take on a spouse and children at this point in my life, although I do hope that I can one day.  I have used solitude to gain a deeper understanding of myself and what I aspire to create— I meditate on the lifestyle I want to design.  I relish in my freedom and when I do get lonely, I call a friend or take Bodie for a long walk.  I am deeply committed to doing everything in my power to protect my mental, physical, and emotional health. I do this not only for myself, but for those who love me.  As I said before, it is a one day at a time process.  I am gentle with the moods and emotions that come and go.  I have created a beautiful routine that I’m excited to wake up to everyday and when things get tough— Disney, onesies, and husky snuggles.

Yours through thick and thin,

Courtney